3 Strategies To Foster Engagement In Autistic Preschoolers

I'm thrilled you're here as we explore three simple strategies to support engagement, play, and communication in autistic preschoolers. As a speech-language pathologist with 25 years of experience in early childhood and elementary education, I’ve seen firsthand how these autism ideas and techniques can help both educators and parents move past overwhelm and develop confidence in fostering meaningful interactions with young children.

1. Transforming Throwing & Dumping into Structured Play

Have you ever seen a child constantly dumping or throwing toys? While it may seem like disruptive behavior, it’s actually a form of exploratory play. Research in early childhood education highlights how actions like throwing, banging, and mouthing objects are natural developmental stages. Some children, including autistic children, may stay in this stage longer than others, but with the right strategies, we can help expand their play skills.

One effective method is introducing put-in activities—structured tasks that allow children to engage with toys in a purposeful way. Examples include:

• Using a container with a hole at the top to drop in small objects like pom-poms or toy figures.
• Playing with the TOT Tube, a clear tube where children can drop in cars, trains, or even spoons—whatever interests them!
• Incorporating favorite characters into put-in activities to build engagement and motivation.

These activities not only meet sensory and motor needs but also lay the groundwork for attention, cognitive development, and communication.

2. Following a Child’s Lead to Build Motivation

One of the most effective ways to foster engagement is by following a child's lead. Every child has unique interests—whether it’s dinosaurs, trains, or a particular type of toy. By incorporating their passions into structured activities, we can create a joyful and motivating learning experience.

For example, if a child loves cars, you might:

• Set up a car ramp with a slot for putting in vehicles.
• Use the child’s favorite cars in a sorting game.
• Engage in pretend play where the cars “talk” to each other, modeling language and communication.

When children feel understood and engaged in activities they love, they are more likely to participate and develop new play and social skills.

3. Integrating AAC into Play-Based Activities

Augmentative and Alternative Communication (AAC) is an essential tool for many autistic children. Integrating AAC into play makes communication both meaningful and natural.

Here’s how you can incorporate AAC into daily play:

• Model words on a communication device or core board while playing. For example, during a car game, you might model words like “go,” “stop,” or “fast.”
• Use simple, repetitive phrases like “wheee!” or “uh-oh” while engaging in play-based activities.
• Encourage turn-taking with AAC by prompting the child to use their device to request an action, like “more” or “again.”

By embedding AAC into fun, engaging activities, children learn that communication is powerful and enjoyable.

Where to Start?

Getting started with these strategies doesn’t require expensive toys. You can create effective activities with simple household items:

• Use a shoebox with a hole for put-in activities.
• Create a DIY ramp for cars or trains to roll into a container.
• Use a whisk filled with small pom-poms for a take-out activity, strengthening fine motor skills.

If you’re looking for additional resources, I highly recommend the book Make Play Rock: Take Out the Toys. It’s a fantastic guide to understanding the different stages of play and how to support autistic children in expanding their play skills.

Recognizing Emotional Responses to Guide Learning

Another essential strategy in engaging autistic children is noticing their emotional responses. Strong emotions—whether joy, excitement, or even frustration—can signal areas of deep interest or areas they dislike. For example, if a child becomes animated when talking about dinosaurs or highly focused when playing with cars, these interests can be powerful tools for engagement.

Incorporating Interests into Learning Materials

Individualization is key when designing learning experiences. While not every child requires highly tailored materials, for those who do, personalized approaches can be game changers. Here are some ways to integrate a child's interests into their learning experience:

• Visual Supports: Customize visual schedules and choice boards with images that match the child’s interests. For instance, a train-loving child might benefit from train icons representing different parts of their day.
• Adapted Books: Create books featuring favorite characters or themes. A counting book can become more engaging if it involves dinosaurs for a dinosaur-obsessed child.
• Interactive Schedules: If a child adores Peppa Pig, use Peppa Pig images for schedule matching activities to encourage participation and independence.

Using Deep Interests to Teach

Leveraging a child’s deep interests can significantly improve engagement in learning activities:

• Interactive Books: If a child enjoys Bluey but struggles with listening to a full story, take pictures of different parts of the book, print them, and use Velcro to create a matching activity. This approach encourages participation and attention.
• Sorting and Matching Activities: Use favorite characters for object-to-picture matching or sorting games.
• Core Vocabulary Development: A child who loves bubbles can learn vocabulary like “big,” “pop,” and “go” through daily bubble-blowing activities.
• Social Skills Development: Turn-taking games using cars, animal stickers, or favorite characters can encourage interaction and cooperation.
• Fine Motor Skills Practice: Incorporate favorite themes into activities like tracing, cutting, or using tweezers to build pincer grasp strength.

Creative Learning Applications

Here are some practical applications of using a child's interests to enhance learning:

• Toileting Support: If a child loves Frozen, create images of their favorite characters sitting on the toilet to encourage potty training.
• Matching Activities: A Cocomelon-loving child might enjoy a file-folder game where they match characters.
• Sensory Play: A child fascinated by Cookie Monster can enjoy a “cookie drop” activity—using laminated cookie images and a shoebox with a Cookie Monster cutout to practice fine motor skills.
• Thematic Learning Units: Build entire lessons around a child's favorite theme. A dinosaur unit might include counting dinosaur footprints, sorting species, and engaging in sensory activities like digging for bones in a sensory bin.

Sometimes, a child's interest serves as a source of comfort rather than a learning tool. If a child wants to engage with their interest without added demands, honoring this can build trust. This trust makes them more open to structured learning when they're ready.

The Power of Flexibility

Flexibility allows us to respond to a child's immediate needs, interests, and emotional state, creating a learning environment that feels safe, supportive, and engaging. When we let go of rigid expectations and follow a child's lead, we can transform frustration into meaningful learning moments.

A Real-Life Example of Pivoting in Action

In a recent session, I was working with a little boy on imitating a thumbs-up gesture. At first, he was engaged, but then I noticed his motivation slipping—his joy seemed to fade. Rather than pushing forward with the original plan, I pivoted. He made a sound, and instead of insisting he copy me, I copied him.

Suddenly, everything changed. His engagement returned, his energy increased, and by the end, he imitated me voluntarily! This moment highlights the power of being flexible—when we adjust our approach to meet the child where they are, we create an environment where they feel seen, heard, and motivated to participate.

Why Pivoting Matters

Pivoting means being prepared to change the approach in real time. If an activity isn't working, it's okay to switch gears. Having a “toolkit” of flexible activities—simple games, sensory breaks, favorite books—can help make quick adjustments that keep a child engaged.

Instead of forcing a predetermined lesson, we can:

• Adapt the activity to align with the child's mood or interests.
• Avoid power struggles that could lead to disengagement or meltdowns.
• Maintain a strong, trusting relationship by honoring the child's needs.

Examples of Flexible Learning

1. Making Learning Fun Through Play
   • If a child isn't interested in naming animals, try incorporating Play-Doh to create hats for the animals. As you model the names of different animals while playing, the learning becomes natural and engaging.
   • If a child enjoys songs, integrate them into the activity. One little girl didn’t respond to direct questions about animals, but when we sang “Mommy Finger, Mommy Finger, where are you?” with her favorite toys, she naturally started naming the animals—without any pressure.
   • If a child loves sharks, use their interest to teach concepts like colors. One child, obsessed with Baby Shark, was excited to make sharks of different colors out of Play-Doh. This allowed for natural language development while keeping him engaged.
2. Reading the Room
   • Pay attention to nonverbal cues like facial expressions, body language, or sensory sensitivities.
   • If a child shows signs of stress, such as covering their ears or withdrawing, adjust the activity or environment.
   • Understand that making adjustments isn't “giving in”—it's creating an optimal learning space that prevents unnecessary distress.
3. Following Their Lead
   • Sometimes the best learning moments happen when we let go of our plan and follow the child’s curiosity.
   • If a child unexpectedly shows interest in something, lean into it! This creates spontaneous, meaningful learning moments.
   • Honor their passions—whether it’s dinosaurs, cars, or letters—and use those interests as a bridge to engagement.

A Powerful Story of Flexibility

A teacher named Shana shared a story that beautifully illustrates the power of pivoting. She worked with a functionally nonverbal student who did not typically use speech to communicate. While trying to engage him with an alphabet chart, he pushed it away—clear communication that this wasn’t working for him. Instead of insisting, she offered an alphabet puzzle. Immediately, he grabbed it and began removing the letters, naming every single one!

Had she remained rigid, she might never have discovered his ability and interest in letters. By following his lead, she unlocked his potential.

The Language of Play

Play is one of the most effective ways to build trust and engagement with young autistic kids. It’s not just an activity—it’s a language of connection.

To use play effectively:

• Join in without altering their play – If they line up cars, line up your own cars nearby. If they spin a toy, spin another one alongside them.
• Mirror their actions – Jump if they jump, make animal sounds if they do.
• Add small variations – Pause before rolling a ball back to see if they request more, or change the speed of a swinging motion to build anticipation.
• Embed new skills into play – If a child loves dinosaurs, use pretend play to build social language skills. If they enjoy sensory bins, introduce new textures while narrating the experience.

Key Takeaways

• Flexibility creates opportunities – Being open to change allows learning to happen in unexpected ways.
• Interests are powerful learning tools – Incorporating a child’s favorite activities makes learning feel natural and fun.
• Always presume competence – Children have untapped potential waiting to shine when given the right tools and approach.

Final Thoughts

Being flexible and ready to pivot ensures that our teaching is responsive, compassionate, and truly child-centered. None of us build our lives around our weaknesses—we follow our strengths and interests. The same should be true for how we support children in their learning.

By honoring what matters most to them, we open doors to growth, confidence, and lifelong learning.

When we honor and embrace what matters most to our students, we open doors to growth, engagement, and lifelong learning.  – Tara Phillips, SLP

Listen to the Podcast: Episode #114

3 Simple Strategies Handout

Themed play visual supports

Put-In Activity Challenge

Play Based Learning

Exploratory Play

Expanding Exploratory Play

Exploratory Play: Tips For Children Who Dump Toys

If you use visual supports in your classroom or home, you are going to want to sign up for this free Visual Supports Starter Set ASAP! Click here to have one sent to your inbox. Also, be sure to read more about visual supports and how they can help autistic children here.